There’s a new term going around - toxic positivity. It is based on the notion that sometimes, when we offer encouragement to others by “focusing on the positive”, we run the risk of invalidating or diminishing the person’s pain. As an alternative, it is recommended that you offer the person “Validation and Hope.” Validate the person’s experience before providing hope that things can change. See the link below for more information:
Working with students who have experienced trauma or other adverse childhood experiences can be difficult enough on it’s own. If the adult has experienced their own trauma or adversity, it can be even harder to remain calm and compassionate in the face of problematic student behavior. See this blog post from Edutopia for some helpful thoughts:
We all know that getting a good night's sleep can help children be more calm and regulated and have fewer behavior outbursts. However, it can be difficult for some children to fall asleep at bedtime and/or fall back asleep when they wake up in the middle of the night. Add the fact that we as parents are also not at our best at the end of the evening and just want our children to "GO TO SLEEP!", making it very difficult for us to patiently help our children learn how to do just that. The article below describes some simple strategies for helping people fall asleep more easily. CAUTION - It is very important to note that the 96% percent success rate quoted in the article was based on SIX WEEKS of practice. One of the biggest mistakes we make when we teach new skills is not providing an adequate amount of practice. Trying this once or twice is not going to do the trick. It will take weeks of consistent practice for your child to become able to utilize this type of strategy. Put the time in upfront, and it will save you time in the long run.
Whether or not you agree with the inclusion of "Gaming Disorder" as a diagnosis, this work highlights the fact that many children (and adults) struggle to control/manage their gaming activity. It is important to have clear parameters/limits regarding game use. However, when your child is not following those parameters and responds negatively to requests to stop playing, it is important to remember that your child is not giving you a hard time, he or she is having a hard time and therefore needs help rather than punishment.
Children with sensory regulation struggles often have difficulties with sleep. Some children have found that weighted blankets provide heavy input which is regulating, allowing them to fall asleep more easily. Here is a recent news article which discusses one such blanket...
Children with social-emotional skill struggles, particularly executive function deficits, often respond in a reflexively negative manner to commands. This excellent blog post describes how to use declarative statements instead to reduce outbursts and promote thinking